Fear of the Oblivion
As I was walking back home from college listening to Heroes by David Bowie, the lyrics struck me. I was suddenly afflicted with my own thoughts like courses of shivers down my spine.
I, I will be king
And you, you will be queen
Though nothing will drive them away
We can beat them, just for one day
We can be heroes, just for one day
Someone once asked me what is the one thing in the world that scares you the most? I never had an answer for that question. But today, I know what scares me the most. The state of oblivion is my biggest fear. Like one day, I would wake up, and people I love so dear would forget my existence. Like I never mattered to them. Change is inevitable, but oblivion isn’t. If oblivion is inevitable, then I’d like to know how? In this 21st century, people don’t even have time for themselves. Every day, twenty-five thousand people die of hunger in this world. Yet, we all live without knowing this, without acknowledging our privileges and continue to crib.
The state of oblivion is very subjective. It differs from person to person. For me, entailing oblivion is blood-curdling. Many people confuse oblivion with fear of death. It’s not like I am scared of death. I’d like to believe that death is peaceful. I’d like to believe that when your soul leaves your body, it becomes free. Free from all the ties and tethers of the world. So, it’s not death that scares me. It’s the state of oblivion while you’re alive. Like your life never mattered. Like you were never able to make the change that you wanted to see in this world. Like people who loved you would stop loving you. Like you never existed in their lives.
So, we all have our fears and struggles in our lives. All of us have an ocean of fears. Fear of water, fear of heights, fear of ducks, fear of fear, and what not! So, whoever is reading this, I would like to tell you that it’s okay to fear something. It’s okay to be afraid. It’s okay to be lost. It’s okay not to feel anything. It’s okay to feel everything. It’s okay! But your fears should not stop you from living in the present. They should not stop you from dreaming about the things that you desire. So, I want to ask you all beautiful humans something. What is the one thing that scares you the most that your blood starts to curdle? And it’s okay to not share it with anyone and just keeping it to yourself.
The lyrics of David Bowie’s Heroes struck my mind again.
I, I will be king
And you, you will be queen
Though nothing will drive them away
We can beat them, just for one day
We can be heroes, just for one day
One day, I will be the queen of my thoughts, and nothing would affect that. One day, I would be able to overcome my fears, even if it’s just for a day. One day, I will be my own hero. One day, I will overcome my fear of being forgotten by my loved ones. One day!
